Mr. Appliance Fixit Boyz Hillstomp Update
Just to rub it in to you guys who backed out, here’s the itinerary for the Mr. Appliance Fixit Boyz Hillstomp in September. See you back at the coal mines.
Day 1: Friday, September 6
Everyone arrives at Brown Compound sometime in the afternoon. We’ll go through gear, make last-minute runs for supplies, as needed, and then adjourn to the Flying Goose Brew Pub for 16 oz. wrist curls where we’ll review the route and carbo-load for tomorrow’s hike. We won’t be out too late because we have to make an early start in the morning. Spacious overnight accommodations in the luxurious Jayco Hilton.
Day 2: Saturday, September 7
We’ll leave Brown Compound around 0700 hours in two vehicles: Fishnutz’ rental and Mr. Grant’s Pickem Up truck. First stop is Wildberry Bagel Shop for morning eats and bean juice then off to the Whites. I wanted to do the AMC shuttles so we could all travel in one vehicle, but their shuttle schedule is not compatible with our route plan…or anyone else’s that I could tell. We’ll drive straight through Franconia Notch to Crawford Notch where we’ll park Mr. Grant’s Pickem Up truck at the AT trail head–our hiking route destination. Then we’ll double back to Franconia Notch to the Old Bridal Path trailhead parking lot, our beginning point. We should be on the trail at about 1000 hours for 12 miles of the meanest, nastiest, orneriest trail that mankind has ever had the misfortune to set boots on along the Franconia Ridge. We’ll arrive at the Galehead hut right about sundown, bedraggled, beaten down, limping, bleeding, and gasping for air. BOOYAH, now we be having fun, yo! After a hot dinner at the hut, we’ll commence massive consumption of pain-relieving fermented beverages while re-playing the three 4,000 footer peaks we bagged (Mts. Lafayette, Garfield, and Galehead) and the spectacular section of the Franconia Ridge we traipsed. We’ll pass out on a bare bunk mattress at about 2100 hours wondering if it’s really possible that life could be any better than this.
Day 3: Sunday, September 8
We’ll wake up to strumming guitar music, gorge on sausages and pancakes and be on the trail at 0900 hours. During this section of the hike, we’ll bag five 4,000 footers: South Twin Mountain, Mts. Guyot, West Bond, Bond, and Bondcliff. We’ll arrive at Zealand hut sometime before midnight, hopefully still carrying most of our gear. And there was much rejoicing.
Day 4: Monday, September 9
Today, we hike out. Depending on how everyone is feeling, we can either be he-men and bag a couple more peaks or we can be little girly-men and take the wussy way out. Y’all already KNOW what I want to do so call the ball. We’ll get back to Mr. Grant’s Pickem Up truck and do that shuttle thang, waa-waa-waa, all the back to the renta-beater on the other side of the range. Then we adjourn to the Flying Goose Brew Pub for a post-hike debriefing. Accommodations again at the luxurious Jayco Hilton. Tuesday morning the Third Annual Fixit Boyz Hillstomp officially adjourns until next year…in ALASKA!
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