Fixitnow.com Samurai Appliance Repair Man: Appliance Repair Wisdom for the Ages: Appliance Tip of the Day: Storing Flesh Meats Safely

Appliance Repair Wisdom for the Ages

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Saturday, August 03, 2002

Appliance Tip of the Day: Storing Flesh Meats Safely

Ever had food poisoning? You know, sitting on the toilet at 2 am, clenching a gallon-sized bucket in your trembling hands with the sluices wide open at both ends. Yeah, I hate when that happens. How 'bout we learn how to store flesh meats so we don't have to deal with that bit of nastiness again? Ok, my little meat-eating grasshoppers, grab hold of those two large lumps right below your lumbar vertebrae and get ready for another wild romp into appliance enlightenment.

The table below shows you the recommended maximum storage times for various flesh meats in your refrigerator and freezer. Read it, learn it, use it, memorize it--pop quiz in the morning. Bon Appétit!

Flesh Meat: Fresh, Smoked, Processed, Killed, or Run-over	Refrigerator	Freezer
Fresh Cow, Pig, Sheep, or Baby Sheep
Chops, Steak, Roasts	3-5 days	4-9 months
Freshly Ground	1-2 days	3-4 months
Pig Meat
Bacon	7 days	1 month
Ham - Fully Cooked, Whole	7 days	1-2 months
Ham - Half	3-5 days	1-2 months
Ham - Slices	3 days	1-2 months
Hot Dogs
Sealed in Package	2 weeks	1-2 months
After Opening	7 days	1-2 months
Lunch Meats
Sealed in Package	1-2 weeks	1-2 months
After Opening	3-5 days	1-2 months
Sausage
Ground	1-2 days	1-2 months
Smoked Links or Patties	7 days	1-2 months
Chicken or Turkey
Whole	1-2 days	12 months
Pieces	1-2 days	9 months
Ground	1-2 days	3-4 months
Chicken Nuggets or Patties	1-2 days	1-3 months
Human Remains
Limbs	1-2 days	4-9 months
Organs	12 hours	4-9 months
Teeth	2-4 weeks	10-20 years
Road Kill
Squirrels	3-5 days	1-4 months
Deer	1-2 days	2-3 months
Moose	1-2 days	1-2 months

Sources: United States Department of Agriculture; Food Marketing Institute; Cooperative Extension Service, Iowa State University; New Hampshire mountain folk lore.

grasshoppers happily munching on various flesh meats with the master secure in the knowledge that they will not get food poisoning and because their bologna has a first name

Samurai Appliance Repair Man cast these pearls at 03:02 ET. [permalink]

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Appliance Repair Wisdom for the Ages

Saturday, August 03, 2002

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