Obituary: Common Sense. Died 24/7/1960 in America’s Heart, USA

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend by the name of
Common Sense who has been with us for many years. No one knows for
sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in
bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such
value lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the
early bird gets the worm and that life isn’t always fair.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don’t
spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults,
not kids, are in charge). His health began to rapidly deteriorate when
well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.

Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for
kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash
after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student,
only worsened his condition. It declined even further when schools
were required to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a
student; however they could not inform the parents when a student
became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Finally, Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten
Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and
criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense finally gave up the ghost after a woman failed to
realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, she spilled a bit in
her lap, and was awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and
Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his
son, Reason.

He is survived by two stepbrothers; My Rights and Ima Whiner.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was

Thanks to Matushka Galina Tregubov for passing this along.

2 thoughts on “Obituary: Common Sense. Died 24/7/1960 in America’s Heart, USA

  1. nh4tom

    Hi Scott,
    I was looking for info on fixing my old GE washer & Googled your site. Quite interesting! A little insanity, a little comedy, a little politics and some appliance repair. What more could a person ask for? But then I saw that you live in NH (only about 1/2 an hour up Rte 89 from us in Dunbarton), it all fits… well, the insanity part at least ;o)
    Oh, by the way – the reason I was searching: I have a really old GE washer that came with the house (could be 25+ years old). The motor is wearing out but the rest of the machine is solid as a rock. I replaced a U bolt that holds the drive pully onto the shaft but the shaft is a little wobbly and worn. I smelled the motor overheating & discovered that I needed to leave the drive belt loose. None of the part numbers match exactly with the newer ones available but info on the motor is as follows: 5KH42DT198, 1/3 hp, 1725 RPM, 6.8A. Will any of the newer motors fit or should I give it up when it finally dies?
    Hope your back is healing well. Keep up the good work.

  2. RWill

    My opinion is do not torture yourself by fixing a 20 plus year old G E (or Hotpoint) washing machine.

    And if you chose to purchase a NEW one do not buy a new GE !! it will NOT last 20 years, I think you would be blessed if you got THREE years out of it.

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