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Sunday, March 20, 2005

The Appliance Repair Hotline Assumes Room Temperature

If you're a regular to this site, you know that one of the features I offered was a Toll-Free Appliance Repair Hotline. I decided to pull the plug on the Hotline. The reason for having it in the first place was to help grasshoppers find the appliance repair help they needed here at Turns out most people weren't interested in finding information so they could help themselves; they wanted live appliance repair help, on the phone, real-time, with the Grand Master of Appliantology. And they wanted all that for free. Amazingly, some people would actually cop a 'tood with me on the phone when I'd refer them to the forum or live help for detailed, personalized instruction in repairing their appliance.

Let's pause for a reality check.

There are more than 1,000 pages of appliance repair help at, all free for the reading. But, that's the problem: you gotta read. One thing I learned about my users is that most of them are the Great Unwashed Illiterati, also known as Boobus Americanus; they see the computer monitor as another form of TV and so look for a talking head to tell them what to do and think. (If you're reading this then congratulations! You've evolved beyond Boobus to Surfus Americanus.)

In addition to the vast repository of appliance wisdom contained in the pages of, I offer personalized and interactive help for free in the Appliantology Group. Only trouble is that now, in addition to having to read, Boobus must compose a coherent message describing his appliance dilemma. D'OH!

The other reason for dropping the Hotline is that we've completely redesigned the main table on the home page to make it easier for users to find what they need when they first visit the site. This new design should obviate the need for the Hotline. If you have any comments or suggestions on the new main table, let me know by using the comment link at the bottom of this post.

Surprisingly, I just don't make enough money running a free appliance repair website to be able to offer live, real-time consultations at no charge. However, live appliance repair help is available as a subscription service, albeit a for a subscription fee that's so ridiculously low that it might as well be free. But, even with such a modest fee, it keeps the live help work load manageable and provides some compensation for my time.

Ok, I have to get back to my day job: licking urinals at the Texaco. Happy fixing!

Samurai Appliance Repair Man cast these pearls at 05:46 ET.  [permalink]
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'San, you are so weird. Yet, for some reason, I trust you. Maybe it's because when I followed the instruction trail you left throughout the Net, like a coyote tracking spoor through a briar patch, I was able to fix my dryer. Just like you said.

I was pleased to contribute to the Samurai Beer Fund, though apprehensive of maniacs drinking beer - somehow, it works for you.

By Anonymous Jim Baker, at March 20, 2005 4:49 PM  

Jim, mucho domos for the brewskis! It really helps wash down that urinal taste I get by the end of the day and properly prepares me for my night job as Samurai Appliance Repair Man.

By Blogger Samurai Appliance Repair Man, at March 21, 2005 11:39 PM  

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